Embracing Imperfection: Finding Peace in the Unplanned Chaos

If you are anything like me, you have everything planned out. You create a menu board for your weekly dinners. You have multiple planning outlets (both paper and digital). You work a full-time job and have a full-time family and things run smooth because of your expert planning skills...until they don't.

When Life Starts Life-ing

How are we supposed to handle chaos?

Every human experiences chaos in their lives at some point. In what ways have you handled chaos in your life? For me, I used to resort to one of three methods:

• Shutting down: The genetic markers contributing to my anxiety and depression run rampant inside me. This method was the easiest and almost subconscious. Things get crazy, I put my walls up and try not to feel anything.

• Allow my mind to become overwhelmed: When chaos happens, my mind immediately goes to what could I have done better and all the negative connotations that stem from the stress.

• Become angry: When my mind becomes full of stress, I would lash out on the people closest to me to try and undo the tension filling me up.

  
  

But God...

While these methods still make their presence known, I've found a much different method - and one that works 100% of the time. God.

Through my darkest seasons, I have found that fully depending on God is the only way to get through life's toughest valleys. In January 2025, I rededicated my life to serving Him while recovering from a craniotomy to remove a cancerous tumor. Talk about a dark place! I wasn't even sure that recovery was an option for me, even though the medical team had full confidence in the procedure. Brain surgery at 36 years old was not in my plans.

Finding Beauty in Chaos

Embracing Life’s Messiness

Life is messy. Period. Nobody goes through this world without experiencing the mess. Some stories sound worse than others, but we all go through deep and dark valleys and when we are in them, we can feel alone. The best news? We are NEVER alone. God is with you every single step of the way, even when you don't feel His presence.

You're in a valley...now what?

1. PRAY (Psalms 46:1): Even if you don't "feel like it", pray. God is right there waiting on you to come to Him. He knows what you need. He understands your emotions and what circumstances you are in. He wants to show you, and everyone around you, His glory! Can't find the words? The most powerful prayer I've ever prayed was two words... "Jesus Help". If that's all you can come up with to say... that's enough!

   
   

2. Get in the Word: The Word is living (Hebrews 4:12)! I never really understood that until I did. You can read the same verses your whole life and go back to them in a time where they take on a whole new meaning...a whole new realization. When I rededicated my life, I knew in my heart that the Word was where I needed to be daily. I made a commitment to make that happen, and you wouldn't believe how much God filled me up on that alone.

   
   

3. Find a Community (Hebrews 10:24-25): I am an introvert by nature. Especially after my brain tumor. Crowds? Noise? Big no. Meeting others and putting in the effort to make that happen? Negative. God has a sense of humor, though. And community is SO important. But knowing that I would never strive for that myself, God placed that word on my heart for 2025. And you know what? I obeyed! Grudgingly at first. But He showed up and showed out anyway. That's a really cool story for another post but find your people!

   
   

4. Keep in Mind: God created you in HIS image and He makes no mistakes. You may not feel like you have a purpose on this earth but if you're still here, He's still got plans for you. Plans to glorify Him and grow His kingdom (Ephesians 2:10).

Do these things with consistency. The chaos may not go away, but God can give you the inner strength you need to make it through...and He will remain by your side throughout.